#yet again i surprise even myself
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"hey onyx how are you doing" i have a oneshot that is currently 50 pages long and still incomplete how do you think i'm doing
#this was supposed to be. like. 8k.#yet again i surprise even myself#<- this is nearly twice as long as my next longest oneshot#my multichap fic wasn't this long i'm going insane#onyx writes
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hi.
#i know most of you didn’t even realize i was gone#but man…#my mental health was like in a state of 📉📉📉 in the past 30 days like we love being mentally ill and fucking insane <3#it was mostly bc i panicked and started obsessing over possible water damage in my flat kind of out of nowhere#like it started when my landlord came to check my bathroom bc my downstairs neighbours had water stains on their ceiling back in july#which had been caused by their shower curtain apparently but i was already spiraling when my landlord told me so i was sure it was my fault#i was assuming it was bc of me bc i had sometimes been spilling some of my bathwater and i was like WHAT IF IT HAS GONE THROUGH THE FLOOR?#and it didn't help that it has been hot af and very humid in my apartment LIKE WELL OVER 25 DEGREES AND 60% HUMIDITY#anyways i couldn’t shake this not matter what i tried and my fucking insane brain made me think i was going to get arrested for like#flooding the whole building or for causing some sort of mold infestation#i had SO MANY panic attacks; i wasn't able to sleep; i wasn't able to eat; i was on edge and panicky basically 24/7 so fun fun fun :D#and i kept waking up in the middle of the night and HAD to go check my walls or the space below my kitchen#it was compulsory like i couldn't not get up and go check and tbh i would've thrown out all of my furniture if i could've to check for mold#(and shhhh i know how fucking insane this sounds but having a mentally ill brain that's anxious all the time does suck ass sometimes 🥲)#(the worst thing about it tho was that i was SO AWARE of how insane about this i was being and yet i couldn't stop losing my mind over it)#(also i was so ready to move tf outta here bc i couldn't handle being triggered 24/7 which is why my mom let me stay with her last week )#i was so out of it that i couldn't even let myself do the things i usually enjoy... like at all#like watching my shows or spending any ungodly amount of time on tumblr... or replying to messages i got from people who i love#ig this goes to show HOW bad this actually was for me mentally bc usually tumblr and my shows are like my safe place#anyways we finally had a leak detection dude come over today and we had him check the water levels in my walls#and he said everything is fine and he specifically told me i should stop worrying about any water damage BC THERE IS NO WATER DAMAGE#he also said that the weather has just been insanely humid this year so it's not surprising that the humidity levels are higher than usual#i’m still a bit scared about some possible mold but ig this is good enough for now#i am aware how ridiculous this must sound for anyone who's reading this now but couldn't let it go not even with meds so let me live pls :(#TLDR I WAS GOING THROUGH IT BUT I AM BACK I THINK AND I AM MOST LIKELY GOING TO START BOTHERING YOU WITH MY GIFS AGAIN <3#AND I JUST REALIZED I HAVEN'T EVEN SEEN ANY OF THE HEART KILLERS STUFF YET ASIDE FROM ONE OR TWO PICS LIKE :(#OH AND I NEED TO START WATCHING SUMMER NIGHT ;_;#sabrina talks#@AIRENYAH GIRL I AM SO SORRY I WILL PROBABLY REPLY TO YOUR MESSAGES LATER TODAY OR TOMORROW MORNING ;_;<3
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@remylong :
#newest broken telephone installment#the remy renaissance#or rather standard avvycc dms. broken telephone elements include ccsims designs of my old designs plus prev hp art plus the general sepia#of everything on fire. bonus to the chromatic aberration on hp it feels quite fitting (yknow bc the chorus behind his lines..) idk vibes#this colouring style is actl terribly fun i'm quite !!! about it. i'm also glad that I made reference sheets for them all long ago bc#otherwise i would have gone insane rrying to rmb them from scratch. lately despite the rainbow hp seems to overall be turquoise blue? which#is so fun compared to the more purple/ neutral blues and greys i have in mind for mark...#anyways doing well! getting back slowly into Making things again! having fun etc etc#have been in OC-land lately but nothing i'm ready to share yet haha#so occassional bit of fanart it is. i inexplicably want to draw hands now though i was walking back home#pondering my adamandi era (mad the most insane fanart i've ever made; no recollection of it now) and after enough mulling it over#it would be nice to return to it. don't think i'm as obsessed anymore but it's certainly not lacking in inspiration#ideas are there just havent reached the sweet spot where you get so taken by an idea you're compelled to turn it to reality#and i think itwould be fun. perhaps even gratifying to set wips to rest#so maybe. in the meantime px11 brokentelephone is sustaining my urge to make miscellaneous fanart haha#melliotverse so true. wonder why despite watching taopp i haven't been compelled to draw it but i get the inkling it's just that specific#aesthetic that doesn't do it for me. <blinks> it was very good and i enjoyed it immensely! i think i just surprised myself by being normal#about a musical for once. i think also bc irl i've been more Good Busy the drive to engage in fandom has dissipated somewhat..#so overall i think it's a good thing. just different. but then again this stretch of time is a transitory period for me so changing ought to#to be expected. ah well tldr don't overthink just do what sparks joy be happy? literally so lucky to be spoiled for choice wrt things#i want to do. so much to do and see and learn and time still to get to figure it all out!
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its been 7 hours in the poll so far and i saw the who ppl want to win coming but i wasnt expecting the who they think will win ngl, like i was expecting it to be a little more even but nope lol
#mine.txt#lifesteal spoilers#< jic#wanted to keep my opinion to myself until the poll ended to prevent influence or whatever but realized that was stupid so here it is#personally i want zam to win but i think theyll come to a stalemate#i want zam to win causeas cute as it would be to give zam a redemption arc and esp by minute of all ppl i just dont like that idea very muc#i want his redemption arc if he ever decides to have one to be long and gruelling and full of setbacks and last for seasons#i want him to keep failing and building himself back up and all over again through the influence of multiple ppl and experiences#i dont want it to start and end all cause of one guy#and with ppl as stubborn as those two it would not surprise me if they reached a stalemate#esp since they seem to have completely incongruent mindsets regarding the nature of lifesteal#identical yet opposites those two#zam may think hes more determined than minute but i dont think thats true i think theyre a lil more even#like not to bring up kings but they both went looking for nether fortresses for hours in the first session#they both kept farming and grinding even when the odds are stacked against them#even when they lose hope they keep going anyway for that tiny sliver of a chance that Something happens#like theres a reason minute looked up to him in s3 and i think its cause he saw a lil bit of himself in zam#or at least what he could be if he set his mind to it#but honestly i dont really care who wins or loses that much#all i ask is that the season ends in an interesting way regardless of if its in peace or chaos#characterwise; plotwise; possibly even metawise#just give me something to chew on and ill be happy
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Currently in my banging my head against the wall phase. Hope you all are well 🥰
#Doc told me to schedule another MRI on Tuesday. They said they sent the order over on Tuesday.#I call on Tuesday to schedule the appointment. They don't have the referral yet#I called yesterday to try and schedule. They STILL don't have the referral#I message my doc and make sure they actually sent it over to the right place. (They did.)#They say they'll fax it over again! Great!#I call AGAIN today. They STILL don't have the referral#Bro I just need to schedule this fucking MRI so I can find out what's WRONG with me#The girl on the phone was like 'Oh yeah we're real busy we get orders all the time it must not have hit the system yet'#BRO IT'S BEEN THREE DAYS. HOW HAS NOBODY SEEN IT. TEARING my hair out#I went to their website to try and schedule online. Guess what? THEIR GODDAMN SCHEDULING ASSISTANT IS DOWN FOR MAITENANCE#SCREAMS#Anyway yes so in my banging my head against the wall phase. I'm so tired#And still in pain! To nobody's surprise!!#They can't fix what's wrong with me if I can't even get in to get an MRI. Hello. PLEASE#This isn't really smth that can wait a couple weeks#I should've been in to see them like YESTERDAY.#My pain is so bad I had to stay at home today. And I go and ice my back every hour or so#Bc I can't sit down for more than 45 minutes without wanting to kill myself ;))))#Shima speaks#I'M SORRY I'm just so. I've been over this for months. And now that I'm THIS close to getting answers#I can't. Seem to get these people to schedule an appointment for me#Grinds my teeth
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I'm so tired
#not to come on here just to complain and feel sorry for myself especially because i know things are so much worse for so many other ppl#but as hard as i'm trying it's hard to believe things will be okay i'm trying so hard not to fall into defeatist attitudes#but fuck man. fuck. it's not even that i'm surprised or anything it's just. man#i want to curl up in a ball and just be comforted and cry and be upset but i can't do that and i have no one to do that#my worker's comp payments aren't coming through like they're supposed to and i have like ten dollars and barely any food in the apartment#my injuries aren't getting better the pain is still there even though i'm doing everything i'm supposed to#my meds aren't working but meds have NEVER worked on me and i keep hoping and praying some day i'll find one that will but i fear they won'#i have more psych testing in january but a part of me worries about doing it because if (when) i test positive for certain things it will b#on my record and considering..... the state of things i worry about what that means for me and my autonomy esp regarding anything medical#i still can't convince any doctors to take my issues that are almost CERTAINLY endometriosis seriously and again.... given the state of thi#i find it very hard to believe that will change and will in fact only get worse and i will never be able to get any kind of sterilization o#hysterectomy and if something ever ended up happening and i DID get pregnant well. it would not be good for me#i feel very alone and like i need to and must handle everything on my own but i feel like i'm about to break doing that#and then this. this. this this this this. i know it's not fair to be upset about it. like i said things are so much worse for so many other#but fuck dude. fuck man. mentally i have not been doing good recently and nothing has happened in my life to really help that recently#i want to go back to being so repressed i genuinely felt/believed i was emotionless this was not a good year for the dam to break#i told my therapist the other day that i feel like a toddler. i was so repressed and emotionless for as long as i can remember#so i never learned to deal with big ugly and overwhelming emotions. so i react as a child still learning would because i never got the#chance to learn how to manage them and FUCK MAN i feel like i'm losing it#i know it's important to do what you can and not fall into overly negative mindsets but that's not something i was good at anyways#and now it's even harder but i'm trying. fuck dude i'm trying so hard i want to be hopeful i want to do what i can#i don't want to hate everything and jump immediately to wanting to kms or destroying my whole life because what's the point#i just. holy fuck. man i need a minute to breathe and i wish i had someone physically here to hold me and tell me it's okay#but i don't have that so i'll be a big girl and sort myself out like usual and just hope i don't break yet#i'm gonna go watch anime and try and read fic to distract myself but mannnnnnnn i feel like i'm losing it#kaz rambles
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#several months ago i had a dream i was sitting with my mom and my sister came in and sat down next to me#and i was surprised but happy to see her but in the dream i couldn't figure out why i was surprised to see her#it wasn't until i woke up that I remembered she was gone and I'll never see her again#i want to go back to having dreams like that#sometime after i had a dream that she'd somehow come back to life and it was a frantic scramble to get her to my brothers place#so that he could see her before anyone else found out but i woke up before we got to his place#and just now i woke up from a dream where we were essentially having a graveside memorial thing#but she was standing next to me and I could see and hear her but no one else could#and she was moving around trying to talk to other family members- including her husband- but they just couldnt hear her#and i had no way of helping them hear her so i just felt useless#these are the most vivid dreams I've ever had and i always wake up crying#im giving myself a headache from crying and I haven't even gotten out of bed yet#kee speaks
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#I have thoughts about the new tour yet I am not sure if I should share (given why I do so in tags)#I am not surprised to see denmark is absent#I am a bit surprised to see no scandinavian country AT ALL#not surprised to see germany and the uk have most dates (that's sadly something I've seen a lot from bands/artists I like)#a little befundled with the route he has scheduled for both germany and the uk dates#glad to see other countries like switzerland france and the netherlands get their debut#not surprised it is in october since that seems to be around the same time for his europe antics last year as well#all this said I am a bit conflicted what to do myself#I'd like to go to gigs on this tour#yet I've already run out of the country four times these past upcoming five months (three times to finland)#since it is quite expensive and maybe not something I will have time for given I hopefully get an internship in august#with that in mind I feel like I should probably go for only a few dates#and yet last time I felt very much like I was missing out and overlooked because I didn't go to “more than two shows”#and here is where I feel like my thoughts are probably not great#i was thinking about maybe going for hamburg as first priority since it is the closest (4 hours in train)#then have frankfurt and munich as second priorities making it a little mini tour#I am not sure if I'd physically and mentally be able to do more than three gigs in a row#yet if I am I sort of want to go to zurich too because I've never been there#two days to decide is not very long#I feel very stressed tbh#and I hope noone will take this in any wrong way#please I really dont want to feel shit again#I know my last concert related take was on the fence#(even though as it turned out the venue did worse than me in that regard)#but this one is really just me thinking about what would be the smartest plan#other possible options would be to go for zurich since it is in a weekend (sunday) and then - depending on whether or not I have work#either go home or follow jere to amsterdam (then maybe paris and brussels)#another option is berlin then hamburg and then to home from there (so two shows)#or london and bristol since its the weekend (maybe manchester as well if it is not far - so up to three shows)#the latter I am a bit concerned about since being trans in the uk is not great atm
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✨Me and Moonwatcher got a lil hype to watch the Knuckles series last night. Gave me something to chuckle at while I rest my angry wrist.💖
#knuckles series#please be nice to Moonwatcher he has't gotten his visor yet 🥺#❗️HEY YOU! Have a stretch break!! do iit!! its good for ya❣️#came into the show thinking it was going to be trash and found myself pleasantly surprised at how much I laughed at it#even my partner who has no interest in animated/cartoon media laughed at it#two autistic men having the adventure of a lifetime ft. daddy issues is it's own fucking mood and I'm here for it#honestly I give it a 7 out of 10 needs more Knuckles#but then again I was zooted af when watching it which made it A LOT funnier#probably wouldn't watch it sober#definitely would watch it tripping balls#Knuckles looks so gosh darn adorable I just wanted to reach into the screen and squish his lil face X3#honestly the only off putting thing I disliked about the show was the religious/political propaganda they tried to shoehorn in there#but not one bit surprising considering it's American corporate television#yet still disappointing -shrug-#at least I got what I wanted out of the show after all... that sweet sweet DILF echidna 😍#actually nvm 6 out of 10 needs more Pachacamac#btm-txt#irl?#why the fuck was Kid Cudi there???#anyways enough rambles...if you made it this far don't forget to hydrate along with those stretches#take care of yourself#love you💖
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y'know it's a night when hal sits and eats cereal in the dark room at 1.30am.
#i was thinking abt it earlier#but i've been crying so much lately like so much. almost every second day if not every day and i dont know why#actually i do kinda know why.#i think im hitting my limit with a lot of things and one of them is my parent dumping their problems on me#earlier today my mom told me again abt the whole debacle with my dad cheating on her multiple times and everyone knows i find this subject#too much for me i dont tlike to think about it or anything and im so tired of hearing it and especially when i lived through it trust me i#was literally there the whole cheating subject is very raw to me for many reasons and im just tired of being the emotional dump so often#especially because she always comes to me for everything all the time and im so sos tire d#everyone always tells me i should consider my own needs as a person and its okay to have them and yk in theory i agree with this but i just#cant. i grew up not having any needs met so how can i let myself have them now it makes me feel absolutely awful with myself to even#consider having to ask for something off someone and yet i know how wrong this is iknow needa and desires and wants are natural#but mine have always been on the back burner for everyone else. so its' no surprise ive let myself think im something to be used for other#peoples sake. whether that be physically or emotionally and especially the latter. because thats how i see myself someitmes. something#something to make people feel betetr about themselves that has no use outside of how i make them feel - just something to use until they#move onto the next best thing. something more entertaining and better value whatever that might mean something with less feelings less#sensitive. it feels like sometimes thats what i am. the indestructible never breaking hal that somehow has a solution to everything and can#always be there to fix every issue and is there to make people feel better but needs nothing in response#and god it really does feel like my problems dont mean anything to anyone#it does feel like no one thinks theyre worth anything#not worth listening to not worth thr same attention etcetc and yknow what i hate hate hate asking for attention and yet i get upset when i#feel like im not actually being heard or listened to#and i find it happens so often. sometimes i wanna hear it just once for once i wanna hear 'hey its okay to be upset i wish i could hug you'#or something like that god i dont want to be strong and nursing my wounds in private anymore#god i want a hug so bad and someone to just let me cry on them just once i want to be held and told someones got me instead of me doing it#for everyone else all the time#is thisselfish? it feels selfish to say#this is why it affects me so deeply whenever anyone does validate me or tells me its ok to want things or that im loved or anything nice#god i cant handle niceness at all it feels like it knocks me so bad it takes me ages to recover#and yet somehow all i can tell myself is that theyre only saying nice things because theyre being obligated to and not becayuse they feel#like they actually like me
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any artists who like to make fake yugioh cards and knows how to draw regigigas taking commissions? i have an idea for a thing
#tried to google for it but was surprised to only find 1 result#how has no one else made that joke yet. is it even a joke?#this idea brought to you by my brother talking to me about pokemon tcg decks and mentioning ''4 regigigas''#also this is only partially a joke because while i very much would like to commission#and would want to pay an artist what they're worth and then some#im trying to make an attempt at budgeting right now so i dont fuck up my bank account again#while also talking myself out of spending too much money on tempus merch again#they released halloween acrylic stands i waaaaaant them
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NO PROBLEM BROTHER ENJOY THE MOVIE <3 AND YOUR FOOD <3
I JUST FINISHED WATCHING IT THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR FINDIN IT THE WAIT WAS SO WORTH IT (;´༎ຶ▽༎ຶ`) (;´༎ຶ▽༎ຶ`) (;´༎ຶ▽༎ຶ`)
#snap chats#i was annoying as hell @ myself cause i kept recognizing actors from other things and i just kept being like#'YO IS THAT UFCKINNN ??????' was absolutely a pleasant surprise to find daito in this movie <3 hi baba <3#BUT MS YOSHIDA WAS HERE TOO !!!! AND MY FAVE FUNNY GUY KAJIHARA 😭#BUT YAYAYAAY THE MOVIE WAS GREAT..... EXCELLENT EVEN.... the credits were so cute#i wont spoil it idk if you watched it yet And Tbh Its Not Even A Huge Spoiler but it was cute......#i love how at this point nakais played pike Three dudes who cheated on their wife/partner thats WILD#the movie was a really great blend of comedy yet still being able to be suspenseful#like even during suspenseful moments where i found myself laughing it was still. MWAH. GORG.#LOVED IT....... nad now im hungry again...#i packed away two rice balls that i ended up eating durin the movie since my fave lunch spot was Unavailable tday#but now i want more food... but now i might be overeatin </3#tbf i did clean my whole flat before i started watchin... tho two rice balls is usually A Meal enough for me#i cant tell if my appetites changing or not i feel like im hungry easily most days now but maybe its cause i Kinda regularly eat now#and so when i go A Bit without eating my body's like 👁️👁️ Dickhead 👁️👁️#IM RAMBLING ANYWAY. POINT IS. GREAT MOVIE. LOVED IT EVEN. //YELLS// TYSM AGAIN FOR EVERYTHING !!!!#another thing to add to my Rewatch Ninety Times list......
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oooo i love when you read/watch/play something and wake up sick with emotion the next morning
#so many quotes are running through my mind its unreal#i feel paralyzed like i dont know what to do with myself orz orz orz#i dont think ive ever read anything with that atmosphere before victor hugo what the fuck man#i think reading it so late at night makes my memory of it feel even stranger like :(#in a way i always enjoy it when a story really affects me but i dont wanna go into a 5 day depression again 😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫😵💫#but i also know its the first time ive read it blind and ill never get to experience that again so im 👍👍👍👍👍 (lays down on the floor)#i like how i havent even finished the book yet so this isnt even including the 'oh my god the entire thing is over this 1300 page book ive#spent 9 months of my life getting through is OVER'#doing marius type [staring into the distance]#i dont know if i need to keep reading or keep away from it today#im a bit worried about exposing myself to this one page so much in trying to analyze it (cause it feels surprisingly a bit open ended?) th#at i like cant read it anymore with a novel and fresh pov so i get stuck in 1 train of thought#despite constantly complaining about seeing lines in advance i feel a bit like i would have wanted to know a tiiiiny bit more because some#of these lines/details were so upsetting and surprising i have WAY too much to process now#i hope honeyheadbanger didnt open the tags. this is about the final ~8 pages of the barricade#i should make a less vague post when we're at the same part#i have one thing left to say: Enjolras........#appelflap.txt
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I think it shows a lot about someone's character how fast they drop someone
#You told me i'm your friend#you asked for hugs and what noit#and for help and advice in games#i was there#and you goddamn KNEW i am fucking depressed right now#you are so well aware of that#yet you threw that in my face#turned around unfollow me and just blatanly ignored me#even when i explained and APOLOGISED for how I acted#even though the only thing I did was be more absent because I'm fighting myself and trying not to SELF HARM again#but you dropped me#in a fucking heartbeat#and now you keep bitching about not having anyone#sheesh I wonder why#i'm not even surprised I got dropped agian#not letting anyone close again#fuck yall#shut up stef
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Blame It On The Rain [Nicholas Alexander Chavez x reader]
Word count: 855
Warnings: oral (m! receiving), rough sex, shower sex, once again completely self-indulgent
A/N: the obsession is going strong hehehe
Copying or translating my writing is not allowed. If you see my work on another site it is stolen. Reblogs are appreciated and encouraged.
Your boyfriend lay on your bed, scrolling away on his phone. Such a simple task, but he looks so damn good. You lean against the door frame, shamelessly watching your unsuspecting lover.
"Hey, Nick?" You call out innocently.
"Yes, baby?" He looks up from his phone.
"I'm gonna shower."
He looks at you, confused, “oookay..?”
"Join me.”
The corners of his mouth curled up into a mischievous smile, "you askin or tellin?"
You roll your eyes, “Meet me in the bathroom in two minutes!” you turn on your heels and head towards your bathroom.
”Or what?" He shouts, still in your room.
"Or you're not getting head for a month!" You close the bathroom door behind you.
You hastily drop your pants and turn on the warm shower water. You hear Nicholas fumbling around in your bedroom. and you're not surprised when he practically through the door.
"That was like twenty seconds dude,” You feign disappointment.
Nicholas just shrugs, taking off his shirt in one movement.
"The waters not even warm yet!"
"Don't care!" He pulls you in for a rough kiss, tongues fighting for dominance— not like you'd ever win.
You waste no time untying his sweatpants and pulling them down haphazardly. You go to pull down his underwear but are met with bare skin. You pause and pull away, you giggle as he chases your lips for more, “No underwear? what a slut!" You tease.
"Says the one who lured me in here just to fuck me,” he accuses.
You gasp and wrap your nimble fingers around his half-hard cock. "I didn't call you in here just fuck you!" You defend, running your thumb over his slit— he hisses.
”Why am I here then?” His voice is strained.
You hum, pretending to think deeply about his question. letting go of him you take a step back. He whines at the loss of contact, eyes trained on you as you remove your shirt and underwear.
Now, just as bare as him you step into the water stream. you sigh in delight as the waterfalls around you.
Nicholas steps in behind you, “Baby this water is boiling!”
You chuckle and turn around to change the water temperature for him. With for back facing him he wastes no time landing a loud “thwack” on your bare ass.
“Ow!! Nick what the hell!”
“I'm sorry I couldn't help myself!!”
“I'll remember that,” you warn as you pull him closer to you by his waist. “You're so hot,” you playfully bite his chest.
“So are you~” he runs his fingers into your hair and tugs your face up towards him, capturing you in another breathtaking kiss.
His now fully hard cock pressed in between your torsos. Backing up, he pulls you with him until his back meets the shower wall. You recapture his lips in a searing kiss, your greedy hands roaming and feeling his toned body.
You part briefly for air, the both of you breathing heavily. Nicholas’ eyes are deep with desire as he trails kisses along your jaw down to your neck. A soft moan escapes your lips.
As much as you wanted to lose yourself in the feeling of your boyfriend— you had brought him here for a reason. “Let me take care of you,” you offer— pulling back from his grasp.
He looks at you for a moment— pupils blown out in his eager eyes.
He moans pathetically when you finally sink to your knees. “Use me,” you mutter.
“W-what?”
“I want you,” you wrap your hands around the base of his shaft. “To use me,” you kiss up the sides until you reach the tip.
‘A-Are you sure?? I don't want to hurt you!”
“Nicholas,” you state flatly. “I want you to fuck my face. Now.”
He growls, gripping your hair tightly. This is what you've been waiting for!
“Tongue. out,” he demands, you stick out your tongue obediently.
He slaps his red leaking tip on it with his free hand before he presses you all the way down his shaft. He throws his head back and it thumps against the wall behind him as a moan rips through him.
“fuck—” he curses, as he begins his steady rhythm fucking into your mouth.
You run your manicured nails along his toned thighs, leaving red scratches in their wake.
You can feel his cock twitch deep in your throat.
You look up at him through your eyelashes— you moan at his fucked out state. The vibration sends him over the edge as he pulls out of your mouth. The string of saliva connecting your tongue and his tip is downright pornographic. Hot ropes of white cum fall on your face and tongue as your boyfriend shouts obscenities from above you.
You rise from your position on the bathtub floor. You reach up and pull Nicholas down for one final kiss— He whines as he tastes himself on your lips.
You pull away, dopey grin on both of your faces. “See now— that. Is why I called you here.”
Tag list (If you want to be added just comment!)
@Nallasstuff @chmpgneprblem @qoopeeya @lilybellalana @sleepysongbirdsings
#friends#mutuals#art#wattpad#writing#original story#fanfic#fantasy#moodboard#fanfiction#nicholas alexander chavez x reader#nicholas alexander chavez#nicholas chavez#nicholas chavez x reader#father charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew#charlie mayhew x reader#smut
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#I guess it’s too hard to send me a message or even slightly acknowledge my presence today#yet another holiday in which you basically just ignore me the whole day#I know you’re busy and I’m not saying you have to drop everything to talk to me all day long#but you couldn’t send a quick message when you got up this morning just to say happy holidays or something?#you’ve had absolutely no time to say anything to me the entire day?#you’re still busy so late into the evening when you even told me you didn’t have that many plans for the day?#it’s just frustrating because it feels like things are going good between us and you’re making more of an effort#so I start letting myself get closer to you again and act like myself more often#just to have this same shit happen once again and make me feel like I don’t matter to you at all#when the time comes to cut you off this will be a driving factor#and yet I bet you’ll still act all surprised and hurt like you’re the one getting fucked over even though you’ve always treated me this way#I’ve had a pretty great day except for this shit going on and bothering me#of course I’m still too tied to you so this is still affecting me way more than it should#I wish I didn’t have so much trouble regulating my emotions in these aspects#personal
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